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Two real Men from NOWHERE

Real Men from N.O.W.H.E.R.E.

Power Level:
Game system: DC Heroes Role-Playing Game

“- Jesus ! Those are the *dead* ?
– *Husks*, sergeant Washington. We call‘em husks down here. I know it sounds like a breakfast cereal, but it’s for their own good.”

We’re on a road to N.O.W.H.E.R.E.

Most info on them is on DC’s Who’s Who #13, in an article from Mark W.A.I.D. Since Mark is a great guy, he said most everything and there’s very little to add on their origin. Out of combat, the real Men from N.O.W.H.E.R.E. have no particular speech patterns, but apparently can only repeat or paraphrase what has just been said. Being husks of dead souls, they have very little creativity.

Sometimes, however, when no superior watch them, a husk may speak from inside the Man from N.O.W.H.E.R.E., asking to be released (“help us. Everything is wrong. We are touched by the dead.”). In short, they’re *creepy*.

The tough part is when the Men from N.O.W.H.E.R.E. start fighting.

Their weapon can be anything from a 70’s or early 80’s comic book advertisement. You know : X-Ray glasses, secret of jiu-jitsu, Charles Atlas ads, various items for lame practical jokes… Basically, junk aimed at gullible 10 years old. Unless you’ve memorized them all, you’ll need a few comics from that period, in which you can liberally choose your weapons.

The real Men from N.O.W.H.E.R.E. will, before they use any particular mode of attack, recite the relevant ad. Most physical attacks will be done by saying “reduce any assailant to cringing helplessness in seconds !” (jiu jutsu ad), “now you, too, can be tough !” (was it a JJ or a body building ad ?), or something comparable.

I’ve chosen to simulate this as an Omni-Power, as their supply is probably infinite and generated via psionic energy ; also, it allows for any variation on the “amazing X-ray glasses” or the “secret of self-hypnosis” or the “discovery of your inner powers”.

Real Men from N.O.W.H.E.R.E. look like 2,5m tall humanoids, and their head is like a giant bird skull, or sometimes a technological approximation of a giant bird skull. They have a great cloak ; their forearms and sash have numerous clocks on them. If they’re bare-chested, you can see a *huge*, drooling, fanged mouth that just stays open. They start disintegrating after having been destroyed, leaving a foul smell and, according to Rebis, “some residual existential terror. It was afraid to die a second time”.

They’re much tougher than false Men from N.O.W.H.E.R.E., but then fighting the Doom Patrol is tough.

What can you do with Men from N.O.W.H.E.R.E. ?

Well, as has been said, they’re sent by the military-industrial complex to squash quirks and freaks, and make the world a rational, normal place. If your players are in the middle of something *really* strange, or are themselves well known freaks, they might be a target for the men in the Pentagon. Of course, the Men from N.O.W.H.E.R.E. were destroyed by the Doom Patrol, but then, how many of your players read Doom Patrol anyway ? :-/

Real N.O.W.H.E.R.E. Man

Dex: 07 Str: 08 Bod: 09 Motivation: Psychotic
Int: 03 Wil: 05 Min: 02 Occupation: Enforcers
Inf: 04 Aur: 02 Spi: 02 Resources {or Wealth}: 01
Init: 019 HP: 000

Powers: Omni-Power: 10, Systemic Antidote: 12

Bonuses and Limitations: Omni-Power has to follow the limits described above. Note that the Men from N.O.W.H.E.R.E. have no HP to pay for their Omni-Power ; the HPs are paid by captive psi-talent Wallace Sage, who can generates a lot of them. You may chose to give your real Men from N.O.W.H.E.R.E. a limited HP pool to fuel Omni-Power.

Advantages: High Security Clearance, Iron Nerves

Drawbacks: Strange Appearance (really), CIA to following their superior’s order, Major Irrational Fear of the Anyhow Stories, Major Irrational Attraction to the Anyhow Stories (oh yeah : the Anyhow Stories are a book full of eerie, creepy tales. They’re read to the husks so as to discipline them, and they exist in the real world. I mean, our world. Well, yours, at any rate).

By Sébastien Andrivet

Source of Character: Doom Patrol, baby !

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